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When letting go feels hard

Life transitions can trigger all kinds of resistance and pain.

Even when you know you need to make a change, the ego will do everything to block you, throwing your most deeply held fears in your face.

You might be afraid of losing all that you’ve worked for or that you’ll suffer a drop in income.

You may also be worried about how you will be perceived if you make this change.

These fears are designed to keep you stuck in old patterns and ways of being and they can be hard to shake.

If you have a pattern of hiding, for example, or doing everything yourself without help from others, it’s much tougher to make great leaps forward in your career (ask me how I know about that one!).

The only way to move around these obstacles is to change your perception and remember that your fears are not based in reality.

It’s not about turning a critical eye inward either. You must be kind to yourself throughout this process.

Would it help to know that it’s not just you?

Every creature on earth finds change hard. For example not all caterpillars spin their cocoons at the same time.  Apparently some of them resist the process of metamorphosis for up to a year, preferring to cling to their familiar larval life than change into the beautiful butterfly they were destined to be.

This state of clinging even has a name. It’s called the Diapause, a period of suspended development between resistance and letting go.

While I understand intellectually that letting go doesn’t result so much in loss as renewal, my reptilian brain takes a little more convincing.

As I try and let go (one fingernail at a time) I remember how:

Letting go of the job I had loved but outgrown felt expansive

Letting go of the idea that my career should follow a ‘conventional’ path felt freeing

Letting go of more money so that it could flow with more ease felt abundant.

The process of letting go has turned out to be my salvation, allowing in more of what my soul craved.

Just as the caterpillar eventually moves out of its diapause and yields to the cocoon, we have to keep taking that next leap of faith so that we too can transition, remembering that a more beautiful, truer future is waiting in the wings if we can just bring ourselves to simply let go.

What do you need to let go of?

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