‘If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.’ Siddhārtha Gautama
How often do you stop yourself from making changes in your life because you don’t know what to do?
Sometimes it’s appropriate to take time out and reflect on our dreams and desires, so we can find our sense of direction again.
Most of the time though this confusion is not even real. It’s just a construct of the mind, an attachment to the need to know everything now.
Confusion helps to keep us safe. It clouds our judgement and prevents us from making decisions that lead us to something new.
Not sure if this is what’s going on for you?
Ask yourself if you have a pattern of putting your plans on hold because you feel confused about what to do next.
The confusion is caused by a false assumption because of course we can never be certain about the choices we make.
But the confusion feels real. So how can you shift out of this state?
Start to notice where it stops you and investigate what’s really going on. Is it an underlying fear? A lack of confidence? Or just an old story about not knowing what to do?
Whatever you discover, make a conscious decision to let it go.
It’s safe to make choices without knowing how things will turn out.
Just tell yourself, I am no longer confused.
Let the fog lift. How does it feel to be free?
You know what to do. You always did. Let truth whisper the answer in your ear.
PS: If you need some help to find your direction, there are still some tickets left for my Transform your Career workshop on Tuesday. We’ll be working on dreams, desires and important mindset shifts for change. Book your spot here.
I hear a lot of concerns about this one so I wanted to share some advice I think might help.
Watch below for my top tips on what to do if you’re more of a generalist than a specialist, and you’re feeling unsure about your next steps.
Got no time to watch? Here are the key takeaways:
I hear a lot of concerns from people who are not specialists because they don’t know how to market themselves to employers, and sometimes they have trouble figuring out which roles they want to go for next.
Here are my top tips for finding your direction if you’re more of a generalist or ‘jack of all trades’ than a specialist.
1) Understand your strengths
Before you move forward, you really need to have a good understanding of your key strengths. There are a few ways to approach this. You can either do a skills audit on yourself by reviewing your employment history (both paid and unpaid) or you can do an online assessment (there are some good options out there, I like the Values in Action Survey). It’s a good idea to get some input from other people such as work colleagues or friends and family because it’s difficult to be objective about what you’re good at. It’s something we all take for granted!
2) Choose which strengths you want to develop
Now that you have your list, review it and ask yourself, which strengths do I want to develop in the future? Which ones are going to help me grow in to the person I want to be? In other words, who do you want to become?
3) Your Passions and Interests
Now that you know which strengths you want to work on, it’s time to figure out how you’re going to do that. If you’re lucky, your current job may offer some opportunities. Maybe you can put your hand up for extra responsibilities or to lead a project. You can also involve your work colleagues outside of hours. For example if you want to develop your teaching skills and you are interested in wellbeing, maybe you get people together for an activity such as running or meditation at lunchtimes.
If there are no opportunities at your workplace, you will need to look at your passions and interests outside of work. Brainstorm your list and it may be a long one if you’re a person who’s interested in a lot of different subjects. When you have your list, narrow it down to your top four interests and look at ways that you can develop your chosen strengths through those activities.
So if one of your interests is cooking and you want to develop your strengths as a teacher, maybe you can offer to teach a cookery class at your child’s school, or if you’re interested in finance, you could look into teaching a ‘how to do a budget’ class at your local community centre or neighbourhood house. Similarly, if the skill you want to develop is writing and you’re interested in art, then you might try writing something about an art exhibition for the local newspaper.
Lastly, before you get excited and run off to do a million different activities, put together a plan for yourself and create both monthly and weekly goals. My advice would be to start small and build up from there, because it’s easy to get overwhelmed.
Not only will you build your confidence and develop your skills by doing this activity, you will also attract new opportunities to yourself and start to see different possibilities for for how to progress your career.
You will be amazed at what will happen when you follow this process.
Let me know how you go in the comments!
PS: My next Melbourne workshop is open for bookings. We had a great group of women at the September workshop and I can’t wait to run this one again a the Swell Centre, Hawthorn on Thursday 8th November.
I’ve also been confirmed as a presenter at the Seven Sisters Festival in March, which I’m so thrilled about!!! Let me know if you’re going along. In the meantime, you can book your tickets for Transform your Career. This is for you if you’re looking to rediscover your passion and find some direction with your career.
There is a reason why this update hasn’t been posted until now, and that’s because April went a little nuts.
There have been new clients, job interviews, PR opportunities. There were also many happy events, including reunions with old friends, social events with new ones and family celebrations including my son’s birthday.
As it turns out this abundance challenge has taught me a whole heap more than I bargained for about what’s truly important in my life.
You may remember at the start of the month, my goal was to create extra income to manifest my dream of buying a home. This has been something I’ve been working hard towards for a long time now, and it seemed like I was in the final stages, where just one last push would get me through to the finish line.
Instead, by the end of week 3 I was forced to take a good hard look at my goal and what it was really costing me. I’m a goal-driven person. I do not like to give up at all. But this didn’t feel like giving up. It felt like a release and a sweet relief. I had been pushing way too hard, and let’s face it, it’s not supposed to be that hard. For those of you who love Tarot, I was the embodiment of the Four of Swords last week. I’d had enough of being in the driving and pushing, followed by exhaustion and recovery cycle. I decided that I can still buy a home but I don’t have to do it right now.
As someone who has a pattern of overwork and trying really hard to achieve my goals, it was jarring to have the realisation that success doesn’t always have to be hard won. I can make a different choice.
So at the end of this challenge, rather than pursuing my goal at all costs I’m choosing freedom.
This decision has opened up a lot of space in my life. If I don’t have to get the mortgage, I don’t have to work full-time hours, which means more time for family and to work on my business and that feels expansive.
I’ve also started a practice of following the phases of the moon which has really helped me make sense of things and release what’s no longer serving me. I’m getting a sense of what being in flow feels like, instead of pushing myself to the absolute limit.
As I write this post, the moon is full and in one of its Yang phases, which means it’s a time for taking action and the perfect time for doing release work.
If you want to do a releasing ceremony to mark the full or disseminating (waning) moon, here are some ideas.
1)Write a journal prompt: What do I need to release at this time? See what comes up for you.
2) Do a check-in on your goal. How are you feeling about it now? What has changed? Are you happy with the progress you’re making? What do you need to let go of to make this happen?
3) Is this goal still serving you? This is one I never thought of before but it came up for me this month. Is it time to reevaluate your goal?
4) Write a forgiveness list. Think of everyone who has upset you, caused you grief or made you angry this month (including yourself). What was the positive intention behind the person’s actions? Write that down too. Now find a fireproof bowl or go outside and burn your list. Breathe. How do you feel? Lighter?
I hope you’ve learned as much as I have about what abundance really means for you through taking part in this challenge. As I discovered, it’s ok to do things your way. Your way is the right way even if it goes against the grain sometimes. All I know is I’m very grateful for all of it and I’m finishing the month on a high and excited about what is coming next.
On that note, I have something new lined up for May and I think you’re going to love it. We’re going to be talking about how to be more mindful with your money, not so much in terms of budgeting, although we’ll cover that too, but how you can direct the flow of money in your life. This is about taking back your power around money. I can’t wait!
We start next week. Don’t forget to follow along on social too.
We’ve reached the halfway point of our challenge. I don’t know about you but it’s been a tough week thanks to Mercury Retrograde, littered with plans that went sideways, and problems with contracts and paperwork. I feel relieved to emerge on the other side with Mercury going direct again today, and a New Moon in Aries tomorrow.
I’m so ready to move on from the emotional, heavy energy of last week.
Having said that, I had to appreciate that there were lessons in those challenges around taking charge and being more of a boss in certain areas of my life. Maybe that’s what Mercury Retrograde can do for us – hold up a mirror to what needs to transform. As we move into the New Moon, ask yourself: What do I need to leave behind? In what ways am I not being me?
Another big lesson for me this week was around making choices that are in alignment with my goals. I have a tendency when trying to manifest more money to say yes to everything, especially when they’re the kind of opportunities I’ve been hanging out for. As I found out this week, you really have to be discerning. Abundance takes many forms and more work is not always the right way to create it. It may sound counterintuitive but more work is rarely the answer!
It’s good to remember that it’s absolutely fine to say no to whatever opportunities the universe brings to your door this month. If it’s not quite right send it back with gratitude. It will allow you to be even clearer with your intentions.
The silver lining was that I remembered what I really wanted was to get started with my fundraising project. I found a not for profit I really want to raise funds for a while ago but have procrastinated over reaching out. I feel like a total novice when it comes to fundraising but like anything else it’s a skill that can be learned, so I’m putting a callout through my networks to get advice. It will feel so good to get moving on this and it goes back to one of my big life goals of philanthropy so I’m glad to be making space for it. Think about how you can give instead of get this month. Not only will it be more fulfilling to help others, but according to the universal law of polarity, when you give you must also receive (I’m pretty sure it’s in the Bible too but don’t quote me on that #lapsedcatholic). Of course I know you don’t give in order to get, but it’s important to give with a cheerful heart and trust that your needs will also be taken care of.
On the home front I’ve been decluttering (again) and creating my home space the way I want it to be, setting up an alter, making it feel as cosy as possible and honouring the change in seasons. We’re deep into autumn here in Melbourne so I’m nesting and grounding myself in appreciation for what I have now – a great way to create positive energy around attracting the new home that I want to buy.
I’m still tracking every cent that comes into my account (more refunds as it turns out – what is going on with that?), and trying to stay in gratitude for every blessing that comes in. There have also been interview requests from journalists and lots of interest in tarot readings from members of my community.
There’s a lot going on this week so stay in the loop on Facebook and Instagram. Let me know how you’re going or tag your post #abundanceinapril.
We’re one week into the Abundance in April challenge and I have to say the energy has been intense around here. I’ve started to build momentum although progress has been slower than I would have liked as I’ve been recovering from the flu.
Having said that, I’ve had so much to be grateful for this week including extra time off to enjoy school holidays with my son, a doubling of employer contributions to my retirement account (out of the blue), an unexpected $70 refund, help and support from friends, negotiating a better deal on a business software package, free parking and some great feedback from clients that I’ve been working with.
With all of that I feel like a lot of new opportunities are emerging but haven’t quite come to fruition yet. In the past this would have made me stall or give up. It’s obviously not working so what’s the point? But now I know that this is really all about navigating the mystery – that in-between time when you set your intention but it feels like nothing major is happening. It’s when you have to take action in faith even though you can’t see results yet. Faith is so important and in the past, this has helped me to overcome so much resistance to what I wanted to create in my life. I’m drawing on this strength again this week to put my plans into action and act on my guidance even when I feel nervous and unsure.
Apart from what has flowed in here is what I’ve learned this week:
1) To stay in gratitude and be thankful for every blessing
I’ve tried to make it a habit to wake up in the morning and give thanks right away for my day and what lies ahead, even if I’m feeling not so great. It definitely gets the day off to a positive start. It’s been easier to do this because I’ve set up a practice most days of writing down every good thing that happened during the day, from the 5c coin to the colleague who helped me out to meeting a new and helpful contact. As it turns out, there is a lot of good stuff happening in my life every single day that I haven’t always paid attention to.
2) The importance of reaching out and asking for help from your community
Because I’ve been ashamed in the past about my financial circumstances, I still find it hard to reach out and share or ask for help from others. I’ve tried to break out of that this week by being in community and sharing what’s going on with my friends and accepting that support and encouragement. This is hugely important and one of the reasons I’m involving you, my community, in this too. We’re all in this together. No one can do this alone, no matter how independent we feel and want to be.
3) To deal with my money blocks in a more compassionate way
This week I discovered that I’ve still got some blocks around what I deserve to have in my life and I’ve become aware of all of the judgements I hold against myself for not being where I want to be financially. The danger for me is getting stuck in that place of beating myself up (which is really just a form of resistance) and letting it go. This has been my main work this week. And by the way it’s common to find that emotions come to the surface for healing when you make changes like this. You’re transforming your relationship with money here and it’s not easy. So patience is required and a bit of love and self-care too.
My intention for this coming week is to get more into the flow of money and abundance and take actions with more ease, rather than pushing myself, and I’m really looking forward to what this week will bring.
Follow me on Instagram and Facebook for updates during the week too. I’ve also got my weekly reading on careers and money going up on Insta tomorrow so watch out for that.
I’ve been working on my money blocks since 2014.
That was when I realised my marriage was falling apart and I was going to have to go it alone with a young child.
Needless to say, getting myself sorted financially has been a major focus these past four years.
And I’ve learned a lot on that journey.
But I’ve noticed that every time I set a new bigger goal for myself all of my old (or maybe new) stuff comes up again, and I run the risk of falling back into my old ways.
- Like complaining about my circumstances even though I know they’re just temporary.
- Acting out of fear or desperation.
- Or not taking the actions I know I should because I’m afraid of what people will think.
Of course all of this negative thinking just attracts more of what I don’t want!
This year I’ve set myself a big goal – to buy my own place. Back in 2014 I never thought this was possible for me. It’s hugely exciting and a little confronting at the same time.
I’m throwing everything at this one to make sure it happens ASAP.
Which brings me to this month’s challenge…
I had this idea to focus on more Abundance in April because I need to raise my own money consciousness to another level so that I can do more, be more and give more.
And I thought what the heck, maybe you might like to join me?
You may be thinking well that’s great and all but how can focusing on the concept of abundance really benefit me?
Well if you sometimes feel a bit hopeless when you look at your bank account. If you think goals like buying property or launching a new business are beyond you, or you’re just sick and tired of living from pay check to pay check then this challenge is for you.
We’re going to literally take apart those self-limiting beliefs that are stopping us from achieving our goals and start taking actions that bring us closer to what we really want.
Some of them might challenge or scare us, but I’ll be here to support you if you run into any snags, and I’ll be documenting how I go on the blog and on social media throughout April to let you in on everything I’m doing to make this happen in my own life.
I want to do this for myself but I also want to support you.
Plus I think it’s going to be a blast!
Are you in?
Here are the guidelines for Abundance in April to keep us on track and in the right headspace for success:
1) Gratitude is a must
The only way to get out of lack mode and into the space you need to be in if you want to attract more abundance is to feel gratitude for where you are (yes even if it sucks at times). It’s also great if you have a habit of complaining about money. Ahem.
2) Track every bit of abundance that comes in
The abundance that comes to us is not just monetary. It’s also about time, resources, fun, love, freedom – all the things we really want (because it’s never really about the money). So I want you to track every bit of good that comes your way. Already in April I’ve had extra days off and two Kiva loan repayments. There is magic in noticing everything that lands in your lap. Do it every day. Write it down in your journal, or track it with an app but make sure you notice and give thanks for it.
3) Let your money flow out as well as in
This is so important and something I had to learn the hard way. Hanging on too tightly to those purse strings will block the flow of money into your life. It helps to think of money like water, sometimes it crashes in like a wave and other times it slows to a trickle but it’s always in motion. When you pay a bill give thanks for the services you receive, buy your friends a coffee, loosen up a little if you tend to be a tightwad (no judgement if this is you – I’ve had tough times too!) and see if this has any affect on what comes in.
4) Allow more abundance in
What opportunities do you have to bring more money in? This may take a bit of digging particularly if you don’t have a business, but the more you can make it a habit to think this way, the wealthier you are going to become. Just to give you a few examples: You could sell stuff, ask for a pay rise, put a callout on Facebook for extra work like babysitting, mending, writing, baking or sign up for Airtasker. Those are just a few to start with. I’ll be sharing more about what I’m doing on the blog in the next couple of weeks. But the key is to attract the opportunities that are right for you – you’re the only one who’s going to know what these are. Be open and aware of any thoughts, feelings or ideas that pop up around this. Don’t dismiss them as coincidences. If I have my way you will never believe in coincidences again after this challenge!
5) Look for signs and celebrate when it’s on the way
Look for tiny signs that your abundance is on the way (like my Kiva loan repayments – I knew that things were being stirred up when I saw that). Sometimes just deciding that we’re going to change our situation and outlook can be enough for the energy around us to shift. Celebrate every tiny win (even if it’s just your boss buying you a coffee – track it!). Smile when you pick up that 5c coin off the sidewalk and give thanks to the universe.
6) Have a cheer squad
There’s no use going to all this effort to change your mindset and your life if you surround yourself with negative vibes. That doesn’t mean you need to ditch your friends but you do need to be mindful of the people you surround yourself with. If they’re Debbie Downers who complain about money all the time, maybe tell them about this challenge or at least explain that you’re making an effort to be positive about your money and you need them to be supportive.
7) Remember your why
What is your big fat why for doing this project? Maybe you want to break a pattern of never having any money left at the end of the month. Or you want to take a really fancy holiday, or like me, you’re trying to get the deposit together for your first home. Whatever it is you need to have it front and centre in your mind to galvanise you and get you off the couch when you have a bad day. Do what you have to do to keep it front of mind whether that’s creating a vision board above your desk or writing it on your bathroom mirror.
OK so here some mantras to help you get off to a flying start in this first week. If things get tough or you find yourself starting to slide into negative energy use these to snap out of it.
- It is safe for me to receive
- I am worthy and deserving of more abundance in my life
- I am becoming a wealthier woman each and every day
Let’s go! I can’t wait. Follow me on Facebook and Instagram using the hashtag #abundanceinapril.
I’m so excited for us:-)